Appreciate God's Mercy

IOI CHRISTIAN MORNING MEAL

TOPIC: APPRECIATE GOD'S MERCY

Indeed, if God were to mark sin, who can stand?
The Bible says "All have sinned and come short of the glory of God." (Romans 3:23)

There is an accuser of the brethren who accuses us day and night before our Heavenly Father, so that God will reign judgement on us and not visit us with mercy (Revelation 12:10).
Luke 13:4 says "Or those eighteen, upon whom the tower in Siloam fell, and slew them, think ye that they were sinners above all men that dwelt in Jerusalem?" So many people have done terrible things and should have died in their sins, but their being alive today is only by the mercies of God.

Many people don't deserve the wealth God has given them, or the healing and deliverance God has bestowed upon them. In Acts Chapter 5, we see that just one lie told by Ananias and Sapphira led to their instant death. They were not candidates of God's mercy.
You are alive today because the mercy of God has kept you. Thank God for His mercy upon your life but don't take it for granted.

LET US PRAY
Where you have been forsaking, useless and abandoned to die mercy will find you and give you a ground shaking testimony in Jesus Name

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Mercy overlooked

IOI CHRISTIAN MORNING MEAL

TOPIC: MERCY OVERLOOK

Paul (formerly known as Saul): God wanted to use Paul, but the law through Prophet Ananias protested because Paul had been persecuting and killing Christians; and compelling them to blaspheme (Acts 26:11).
Paul didn't deserve to become an Apostle of Jesus but God showed him mercy, and told Ananias He would use Paul and visit him with mercy (Acts 9:13-15).

Jacob: He was a trickster who didn't deserve the mercy of God. He was a liar, he consciously did everything wrong. In Genesis 32:10, he said "I am not worthy of the least of all the mercies, and of all the truth, which thou hast shewed unto thy servant; for with my staff I passed over this Jordan; and now I am become two bands." Jacob knew he was not worthy of God's mercy.

Whichever way you too has thought you didn't deserve Gods mercy because of your past, I want you to know that everyone deserve God's mercy inasmuch as you acknowledge Jesus as your lord and savior,

LET US PRAY
No matter how bad and worsen your past must has been, mercy of God will rewrite your story and make your life meaningfully great and jealously productive in Jesus Name

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Power of Mercy

IOI CHRISTIAN MORNING MEAL

TOPIC: POWER OF MERCY

Naaman the Syrian received God's mercy: He was a leper who came to Israel for healing and he was instructed to go to River Jordan and wash.
But he asked "Are not Abana and Pharpar, rivers of Damascus, better than all the waters of Israel? May I not wash in them, and be clean?" After asking, he turned and went away in a rage. However, God in His mercy overlooked his insolence and healed him (2 Kings 5:12).

Luke 4:27 says "And many lepers were in Israel in the time of Eliseus the prophet; and none of them was cleansed, saving Naaman the Syrian." Inspite of the act that he was a Syrian, God still singled him out for healing.

If God were to consider our sins, many of us would not be alive today; but He has chosen to overlook our faults and have mercy on us.

LET US PRAY
My prayer is that, in this month of the LORD's mercies, you will receive His mercy in Jesus Mighty Name.

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Mercy

IOI CHRISTIAN MORNING MEAL

TOPIC: MERCY

Matthew 15:21-28 KJV
Then Jesus went thence, and departed into the coasts of Tyre and Sidon. [22] And, behold, a woman of Canaan came out of the same coasts, and cried unto him, saying, Have mercy on me, O Lord, thou Son of David; my daughter is grievously vexed with a devil. [23] But he answered her not a word. And his disciples came and besought him, saying, Send her away; for she crieth after us. [24] But he answered and said, I am not sent but unto the lost sheep of the house of Israel. [25] Then came she and worshipped him, saying, Lord, help me. [26] But he answered and said, It is not meet to take the children's bread, and to cast it to dogs. [27] And she said, Truth, Lord: yet the dogs eat of the crumbs which fall from their masters' table. [28] Then Jesus answered and said unto her, O woman, great is thy faith: be it unto thee even as thou wilt. And her daughter was made whole from that very hour.

What Is Mercy?

Mercy means giving you what you do not deserve. It means withholding punishment that you deserve. Mercy also means unmerited favour, an act of kindness or compassion. The woman and her daughter in our reference Scripture did not qualify for Jesus' intervention because of their pedigree, but God withheld punishment and blessed them with the blessings they do not deserve.

LET US PRAY
I prophesy into your life that this month, God will give you things that you did not deserve. God will overlook your faults and withhold punishment from you in Jesus Mighty Name.

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Why was Jesus Silent?

IOI CHRISTIAN MORNING MEAL

TOPIC: Why Was Jesus Silent?

Matthew 15:21-28

Matthew 15:22-23 KJV
And, behold, a woman of Canaan came out of the same coasts, and cried unto him, saying, Have mercy on me, O Lord, thou Son of David; my daughter is grievously vexed with a devil. [23] But he answered her not a word. And his disciples came and besought him, saying, Send her away; for she crieth after us.

Jesus was silent possibly because she was not a Jew, hence, she was not entitled to the benevolence she was requesting. Looking at the Scripture, Jesus answered her in Matthew 15:26 when He said "It is not right (proper, becoming, or fair) to take the children's bread and throw it to the little dogs." In Matthew 10:5-6, when Jesus sent out His disciples and charged them to "Go not into the way of the Gentiles, and into any city of the Samaritans enter ye not: but go rather to the lost sheep of the house of Israel." He made them understand that salvation was for the Jews first, as the dispensation of the Gentiles had not come. Paul says in Romans 1:16 that the Gospel of Christ is the power of God unto salvation to every one that believeth; to the Jews first and to the Gentiles. Salvation was first for the Jews, so this woman was not qualified for divine intervention because she was a gentile. Everything was against her. Though She called Jesus the Son of David but He is more than that. The divine intervention she wanted for her daughter was reserved for the children of God and not for dogs (Matthew 15:26). This woman's state can be likened to those who are not yet born-again which Ephesians 2:11-12 [KJV] refers to; "Wherefore remember, that ye being in time past Gentiles in the flesh, who are called Uncircumcision by that which is called the Circumcision in the flesh made by hands; that at that time ye were without Christ, being aliens from the commonwealth of Israel, and strangers from the covenants of promise, having no hope, and without God in the world." This woman was a stranger from the Covenant of Promise. Hence, if you don't know Jesus Christ as your personal LORD and Saviour, your situation is hopeless. It doesn't matter if you think you are doing well right now, it is only the blessings of the Lord that maketh rich and adds no sorrow.

Since it appeared the woman was not getting through to Jesus; she appealed to the mercy of God. She told Jesus "Have mercy on me..."

LET US PRAY
In Jesus Name this week God will have mercy on you on every side

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Strategy to Overcome

IOI CHRISTIAN MORNING MEAL

TOPIC: Strategy to Overcome

Mark 1:35-39

We see Jesus being attacked by the devil at every turn: chapter1:14, John the Baptist is imprisoned; vs.24, evil spirits speaks lies against him, "Have you come to destroy us?" It reads as if one thingafter another confronts Jesus as he starts his earthly ministry. Thereis no time to stop, no time to rest. There is so much to be done as weread in vs. 33-34, "he drove out many demons, he healed many who were sick."

Jesus is fighting against the power of Satan. How does Jesus remain strong in that battle? We need to know because the battle still goes on today.

You are fooling yourself, you are being fooled by Satan if you think everything is fine. We still face persistent temptation and attack by Satan.
Events like sickness, trouble, pain, hardship, disappointment, even death. These are constant struggles in this sin-filled world.

Where do we get the strength to stand against this attack, to keep fighting the good fight of faith?

Where does Jesus get the strength? We might think of him as some kind of super hero: The Son of God. He has super powers and just keeps going. Of course it is true that Jesus as Son of God is the greatest, the most powerful person who ever lived. He demonstrates his divine power in healing, casting out demons, even raising the dead (Mark 5). But we need to remember that Jesus was also completely human. He was "like us in every way" the author of Hebrews tells us, except he was without sin. (Heb 4:15).

Here in Mark 1 we see the importance for Jesus to do the work he is doing, to stand against the devil, to overcome the flood of sin and evil in the world, to be strong in the Lord and in his mighty power. Jesus needs to be strong in that communion with God. Jesus takes the time to pray.

How much time do you spend in personal devotions? I’m afraid the devil has succeeded in convincing many here that it is not important. Or maybe we can agree it is important but for you there is really no time. Many here do the equivalent of no devotions. No personal devotions, No prayer, No Bible reading,
No time in the week, so you feel weak, you are weak. Weak in the faith, weak in prayer, with little Bible knowledge, little sense of God working in your life, powerless before the temptations and attacks of the devil. Busy all right. The devil has you busy being "ineffective and unproductive." (2 Peter 1:8)

You can tell if you are this kind of a weak believer if you do not have a special time set aside. The Bible is speaking to you today. Jesus is demonstrating for you the importance of setting aside a time, a special time.
Maybe you think you are strong enough in the faith, you can manage without a special devotional time. Don’t you think Jesus was tempted that way by Satan too? Satan could say, "You are the son of God, you know what you are about, you don’t need it." We are so quickly tempted. We feel we know it all. We don’t need to study the Bible more. We have better things to do. We are busy.

Jesus took a special time. Perhaps you can start with 10 minutes in the morning or at the end of the day, or maybe even in between somewhere. Take the Bible, some devotional material, read and pray. Get in tune with God. Consider his will for you, for your relationship to your spouse, kids, family, in church. Start now, start today, decide right now, pick a time.

LET US PRAY
In Jesus Name, you will not die unfulfilled

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Prayer Drives Away All Fears

IOI CHRISTIAN MORNING MEAL

TOPIC: Prayer Drives Away All Fear

David the king said:
Lord, how are they increased that trouble me! many are they that rise up against me. Many there be which say of my soul, There is no help for him in God. Selah. But thou, O Lord, art a shield for me; my glory, and the lifter up of mine head. I cried unto the Lord with my voice, and he heard me out of his holy hill. (Psalm 3:1-4)

David’s enemies had increased greatly. Trouble was all around. They mocked his faith in God and said, “Who can help him now?” But David knew the secret of deliverance from trouble. He cried to the Lord and found Him to be a present help in time of trouble.
You, too, will experience God’s power as you call on Him in your time of anguish and fear, for you will find Him to be your shield and the lifter of your head. And as you seek Him, He will fill you with His peace and cause your sleep to be sweet as He holds you in His arms and sustains you.
Truly great peace belongs to those who know how to call upon the Lord.

LET US PRAY
Every chains of darkness and scheme around you to frustrate you is hereby destroyed in Jesus Name

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A Place of deliverance

IOI CHRISTIAN MORNING MEAL

TOPIC: A Place of Deliverance

Job 28:9 tells us that God puts forth His hand upon the rock and overturns mountains by the roots: It is only as we pray that obstacles are revoked from our path. It is there He makes for us a way of escape and sends His power to bring us out:
“He cutteth out rivers among the rocks; and his eye seeth every precious thing (verse 10).

It is as we seek Him that He binds floods from overflowing over our lives, protecting and keeping us, revealing to us His love and His will, for the thing that is hid, He brings forth to light:
“He bindeth the floods from overflowing, and the thing that is hid bringeth he forth to light” (verse 11).

Prayer is the only place of protection, deliverance, and revelation:

He that dwelleth in the secret place of the most High shall abide under the shadow of the Almighty. I will say of the Lord, He is my refuge and my fortress: my God; in him will I trust. Surely he shall deliver thee from the snare of the fowler, and from the noisome pestilence. He shall cover thee with his feathers, and under his wings shalt thou trust: his truth shall be thy shield and buckler. Thou shalt not be afraid for the terror by night; nor for the arrow that flieth by day; Nor for the pestilence that walketh in darkness; nor for the destruction that wasteth at noonday. A thousand shall fall at thy side, and ten thousand at thy right hand; but it shall not come nigh thee. (Psalm 91:1-7)

Through the prophet Jeremiah, God sent us His royal invitation and said,
“Call unto me, and I will answer thee, and shew thee great and mighty things, which thou knowest not” (Jeremiah 33:3).

Dangers and trials will come our way, but if we obey the command of Proverbs 27:12, we cannot be defeated or overcome. We will prevail, for none who prays ever fails:

“A prudent man foreseeth the evil, and hideth himself; but the simple pass on, and are punished.”
Only as we hide in God—not like Adam who hid from God—can we find continual safety from harm. For God in His great love will warn us of coming dangers, yet He expects us to beware and hide in Him. Only the prudent know how to pray. The foolish neglect God and are punished.

“And call upon me in the day of trouble: I will deliver thee, and thou shalt glorify me”(Psalm 50:15).

LET US PRAY
In Jesus Name God will deliver you of every spirit of affliction

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Secret place

IOI CHRISTIAN MORNING MEAL

TOPIC: SECRET PLACE

Do you realize that movements on earth govern movements in heaven? Do you realize that a child of God in prayer affects decisions in heaven? The Lord declared:
“Whatsoever ye shall bind on earth shall be bound in heaven; and whatsoever ye shall loose on earth shall be loosed in heaven (Matthew 18:18).

So awesome is this power that it releases angels to do God’s bidding on the earth and binds demons as it destroys the purpose of the enemy!

PRAYER – A Place of Supernatural Protection
Job tells us there is a secret place, known and available only to God’s children. And when God’s children enter into it, only then is the power of God activated on their behalf and on behalf of those in desperate need:

“There is a path which no fowl knoweth, and which the vulture’s eye hath not seen: The lion’s whelps have not trodden it, nor the fierce lion passed by it” (Job 28:7-8).

There is a path, a place which no fowl knows. That place is the secret place, that glorious place so secure and protected that no demonic power can find it. It is a place hidden in God that no vulture’s eye has seen. No demon on earth or satan, the enemy of our souls, has seen or knows. It is a place of refuge, a place of safety that no lion’s whelps (principalities and powers) pass by—not even the lion, satan. That place is the place of prayer. The psalmist tells us it is in that secret place that you will find the Lord to be your refuge and fortress, and it is in that secret place that He covers you with His wings so that no evil will befall you nor will any plague come nigh to your dwelling. That secret path, that secret place is prayer.

LET US PRAY
Heaven will open unto you and pour out his blessing upon you this week as an answer to your prayers in Jesus Name

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QUESTIONS THAT HUSBAND AND WIFE NEED TO ASK THEMSELVES

IOI CHRISTIAN MORNING MEAL

TOPIC: QUESTIONS THAT HUSBAND AND WIFE NEED TO ASK THEMSELVES

Yesterday morning meal was for the youth preparing to get married and questioned they need to ask each other, and I believe it has blessed many, I am forwarding this for the wedded couple as well to balance the equation for a better and sweet home.

The honeymoon can last five days or five years, but at some point the heat and hormones subside.
Oh, yeah? Romance can never last, but intimacy can never end.

In marriage There are questions that When we began to answer, something wonderful will begin to happened. We will started to get to know each other beyond love and sex.

Please ask yourself

The Questions

1. What have you learned to appreciate about me that you didn’t know when we first married?

2. What have you learned that irritates, upsets or frightens you?

3. Are you satisfied with the amount of time we spend together? The amount of time we spend separately?

4. Have we had any major life shocks? If so, what did we learn about ourselves, each other, our relationship?

5. What dreams or expectations did we have about married life? Which have been fulfilled and which have not?

6. What have I given up for you? How do I feel about it?

7. What have you given up for me? How do you feel?

8. At what times have we felt happiest together?

9. Is our sexual connection satisfying to you? To me?

10. How do we manage when desire levels differ?

11. Where are you feeling content in your life? Our life?

12. How much money do we have now? How much did we think we would have at this point?

13. How much money do we wish we had? How much do we want in five years? Ten years? Are we planning for retirement?

14. How much is each of us contributing to our financial health? Is each person’s contribution acceptable to the other?

15. Are we preparing for our parents’ aging and death? (Emotionally, financially, spiritually.)

16. Are we in agreement about having children, raising them, educating them?

17. If we have children, have we explained to them about sex, death, God? Are we comfortable with how we’ve dealt with these topics? How are they doing with these explanations?

18. How have we learned to cope with the normal, day-to-day irritations of married life? How could we handle them even better?

19. Do we feel more emotionally connected than we did early in our relationship?

20. How would we define love now? How does it compare with what we thought love was when we married?

LET US PRAY
In Jesus Name your home will not scatter, your love will not grow cold, your achievements will be great and your blessings much

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Questions to be ask before getting married

IOI CHRISTIAN MORNING MEAL

TOPIC: Questions to Ask Before Getting Married

Amos 3:3 KJV
Can two walk together, except they be agreed?

When it comes to marriage, what you don’t know really can hurt you.

Whether because of shyness, lack of interest or a desire to preserve romantic mystery, many couples do not ask each other the difficult questions that can help build the foundation for a stable marriage, according to relationship experts.

In addition to wanting someone with whom they can raise children and build a secure life, those considering marriage now expect their spouses to be both best friend and confidant.

Sure, there are plenty of questions couples can ask of each other early in the relationship to help ensure a good fit, but let’s face it: most don’t.

“If you don’t deal with an issue before marriage, you deal with it while you’re married,” said Robert Scuka, the executive director of the National Institute of Relationship Enhancement. It can be hard to keep secrets decade after decade, and reticence before the wedding can lead to disappointments down the line.

The following questions, intimate and sometimes awkward, are designed to spark honest discussions and possibly give couples a chance to spill secrets before it’s too late.

1. Did your family throw plates, calmly discuss issues or silently shut down when disagreements arose?

2. Will we have children, and if we do, will you change diapers?

3. Will our experiences with our exes help or hinder us?

4. How important is religion? How will we celebrate religious holidays, if at all?

5. Is my debt your debt? Would you be willing to bail me out?

6. What’s the most you would be willing to spend on a car, a couch, shoes?

7. Can you deal with my doing things without you?

8. Do we like each other’s parents?

9. How important is sex to you?

10. How far should we take flirting with other people? Is watching pornography O.K.?

11. Do you know all the ways I say “I love you”?

12. What do you admire about me, and what are your pet peeves?

13. How do you see us 10 years from now?

14. Will you do your best to help me make Heaven at the end

LET US PRAY
Whatever is planted by the enemy to destroy your relationship is uprooted in Jesus Name

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How to make your marriage last and enjoyable

IOI CHRISTIAN MORNING MEAL

TOPIC: HOW TO MAKE YOUR MARRIAGE LAST AND ENJOYABLE

Making marriage last - what is the key?"

What can a married couple do to ensure that their marriage will last? The first and most important issue is one of obedience to God and His Word. This is a principle that should be in force before the marriage begins. God says, “Do two walk together unless they have agreed to do so?” (Amos 3:3). For the born-again believer, this means not beginning a close relationship with anyone who is not also a believer. “Do not be yoked together with unbelievers. For what do righteousness and wickedness have in common? Or what fellowship can light have with darkness?” (2 Corinthians 6:14). If this one principle were followed, it would save a lot of heartache and suffering later in marriages.

Another principle that would protect the longevity of a marriage is that the husband should obey God and love, honor, and protect his wife as he would his own body (Ephesians 5:25–31). The corresponding principle is that the wife should obey God and submit to her own husband “as to the Lord” (Ephesians 5:22). The marriage between a man and a woman is a picture of the relationship between Christ and the church. Christ gave Himself for the church, and He loves, honors, and protects her as His “bride” (Revelation 19:7–9).

Building on the foundation of a godly marriage, many couples find practical ways to help make their marriages last: spending quality time together; saying, “I love you” often; being kind; showing affection; offering compliments; going on dates; writing notes; giving gifts; and being ready to forgive, for example. All these actions are encompassed by the Bible’s instructions to husbands and wives.

When God brought Eve to Adam in the first marriage, she was made from his “flesh and bone” (Genesis 2:21) and they became “one flesh” (Genesis 2:23–24). Becoming one flesh means more than just a physical union. It means a meeting of the mind and soul to form one unit. This relationship goes far beyond sensual or emotional attraction and into the realm of spiritual “oneness” that can only be found as both partners surrender to God and each other. This relationship is not centered on “me and my” but on “us and our.” This is one of the secrets to a lasting marriage.

Making a marriage last for a lifetime is something both partners have to make a priority. Couples whose marriages last celebrate their commitment to each other. Many couples make it a point not to even speak of divorce, even in anger. Solidifying one’s vertical relationship with God goes a long way toward ensuring the horizontal relationship between a husband and wife is a lasting, God-honoring one.

A couple who desires their marriage to last must learn how to deal with problems. Prayer, Bible study, and mutual encouragement are good. And there is nothing wrong with seeking outside help; in fact, one of the purposes of the church is to “spur one another on toward love and good deeds” (Hebrews 10:24). A struggling couple should seek advice from an older Christian couple, a pastor, or a biblical marriage counsellor.

LET US PRAY
Every evil power that want to crash your marriage will be crush to death in Jesus Name

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Dating and Courting

IOI CHRISTIAN MORNING MEAL

TOPIC: DATING AND COURTING

Although the words “courtship” and “dating” are not found in the Bible, we are given some principles that Christians are to go by during the time before marriage. The first is that we must separate from the world's view on dating because God's way contradicts the world's (2 Peter 2:20). While the world’s view may be to date around as much as we want, the important thing is to discover the character of a person before making any commitment to him or her. We should find out if the person has been born again in the Spirit of Christ (John 3:3-8) and if he or she shares the same desire toward Christ-likeness (Philippians 2:5). The ultimate goal of dating or courting is finding a life partner.
The Bible tells us that, as Christians, we should not marry an unbeliever (2 Corinthians 6:14-15) because this would weaken our relationship with Christ and compromise our morals and standards.

When one is in a committed relationship, whether dating or courting, it is important to remember to love the Lord above all else (Matthew 10:37). To say or believe that another person is “everything” or the most important thing in one’s life is idolatry, which is sin (Galatians 5:20; Colossians 3:5). Also, we are not to defile our bodies by having premarital sex (1 Corinthians 6:9, 13; 2 Timothy 2:22). Sexual immorality is a sin not only against God but against our own bodies (1 Corinthians 6:18). It is important to love and honor others as we love ourselves (Romans 12:9-10), and this is certainly true for a courtship or dating relationship. Whether dating or courting, following these biblical principles is the best way to have a secure foundation for a marriage. It is one of the most important decisions we will ever make, because when two people marry, they cleave to one another and become one flesh in a relationship which God intended to be permanent and unbreakable (Genesis 2:24; Matthew 19:5).

LET US PRAY
Every Spirit of marital confusion, delay and disappointment on your way, catch fire in Jesus name, you are rightly connected to the right person for you in Jesus name

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What should be the response of a Christian whose spouse has had an affair?

IOI CHRISTIAN MORNING MEAL

TOPIC: What should be the response of a Christian whose spouse has had an affair?

Infidelity creates a very difficult and painful situation, one that involves all the emotions, and, for the Christian, can stretch faith almost to the breaking point. The best thing to do is “turn all your worries over to Him. He cares about you” (1 Peter 5:7). If you have been wronged, go to the Lord for comfort, wisdom, and direction on a daily basis. God can help us through the deepest of trials.

Adultery is always wrong. “God will judge the adulterer and all the sexually immoral” (Hebrews 13:4). The injured party should rest in the truth that God is the avenger. The wronged individual does not need to fret over getting even. God will do a much better job of avenging us. When we are betrayed, we need to commit the pain to the One who knows every detail and will deal with it appropriately.

PRAY. Seek the Lord for wisdom, for healing, and for guidance. Pray for yourself, pray for the offender, and pray for anyone else involved. Pray for the Lord to direct your thoughts, words, actions, and decisions.

BE HONEST. A betrayed spouse is going to suffer the effects of deep hurt. It is appropriate to engage the anger and hurt caused by infidelity. Expressing these emotions to God can be a first step toward true healing (see Psalm 77:1–2). Giving our emotions and needs over to God allows Him to minister to our hearts so that we can begin to let go of the offense. Godly counsel from a Christian counselor or pastor is helpful.

BE WILLING TO FORGIVE. We are to forgive others as we have been forgiven (Ephesians 4:32). We should be willing and ready to extend forgiveness to anyone, including a spouse who has had an affair, who comes to us in repentance, confessing his sin (Matthew 6:14 –15; 18:23 –35; Ephesians 4:31 –32; Colossians 3:13). True forgiveness may not be accomplished for some time, but the willingness to forgive should be present always. To harbor bitterness is sin and will negatively affect everyday decisions.

BE WISE. We must consider the possibility that the unfaithful spouse does not repent of his or her sin. Are we to forgive a person who does not confess his sin and remains unrepentant? Part of the answer is to remember what forgiveness is not:

Forgiveness is not forgetting. We are not asked to forget the experience but to deal with it and move forward.

Forgiveness is not the elimination of consequences. Sin has natural consequences, and even those who are forgiven may still suffer as a result of their past choices: “Can a man walk on hot coals without his feet being scorched? So is he who sleeps with another man’s wife; no one who touches her will go unpunished” (Proverbs 6:28–29).

Forgiveness is not a feeling. It is a commitment to pardon the offender. It is a transaction made between the offended and the offender. Feelings may or may not accompany forgiveness.

Forgiveness is not a private, secret act within an individual’s heart. Forgiveness involves at least two people. This is why confession and repentance are required.

Forgiveness is not the automatic restoration of trust. It is wrong to think that forgiving an unfaithful spouse today means everything is back to normal tomorrow. Scripture gives us many reasons to distrust those who have proved themselves untrustworthy (see Luke 16:10–12). Rebuilding trust can only begin after a process of reconciliation involving true forgiveness—which, of course, involves confession and repentance.

Also, importantly, forgiveness offered is not the same as forgiveness received. The attitude of forgiveness—being willing to forgive—is different from the actual transaction of forgiveness. We must not short-circuit the process of confession and repentance and the rebuilding of trust.

Forgiveness may be offered by the wronged spouse, but, to be complete, it requires that the one who had the affair acknowledges his need for forgiveness and receives it, bringing reconciliation to the relationship.

BE FORGIVEN. “If we confess our sins, he is faithful and just and will forgive us our sins and purify us from all unrighteousness” (1 John 1:9). When a marriage is in crisis, both parties should ask God to help them see how each may have contributed to the whole situation and be released from the weight of guilt before God. From that point on, there will be freedom to seek His counsel and guidance. His Holy Spirit will enable them to do what they could not do on their own. “I can do all this through him who gives me strength” (Philippians 4:13).

As God leads, true forgiveness and reconciliation are possible. No matter how long it takes, every effort must be made to forgive and reconcile (see Matthew 5:23–24). As to whether to stay or to leave, “whoever divorces his wife and marries someone else commits adultery—unless his wife has been unfaithful” (Matthew 19:9, NLT). While the innocent party may have grounds for divorce, God’s preference is forgiveness and reconciliation.

In summary, when a Christian’s spouse has had an affair, the wronged party must guard against bitterness (Hebrews 12:15) and be careful not to repay evil for evil (1 Peter 3:9). We should be willing to forgive and genuinely want reconciliation; at the same time, we should not extend forgiveness to the unrepentant. In all things we must seek the Lord and find our wholeness and healing in Him.

LET US PRAY
Every power and evil agent working to scatter your marriage or relationship shall catch fire in Jesus name

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